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Family Dining on Nerves of Steel

It never ceases to amaze me why families ever bother to dine out. Everyone arrives jubilant with the prospect of having a fun meal together, a well-deserved treat. Smiles are passed all around as each family member squeezes into the booth, a high chair pulled up for the toddler, menus cordially handed out and a chorus of "thank you” offered up. Hunger seeming to have obliterated the lengthy history of hellish dine-outs.       "I'm starving," the four-year-old daughter professes, clapping her hands together. The nine-year old son sits with a newly slumped face, realization kicking in of being ripped from his friend's house to be dragged along on some masochistic family fun-time at the Stuff Your Face For A Buck Emporium.      Eyes glued on the menus, the husband and wife scan the choices while the son and daughter fight over sharing the third menu. The toddler commences dropping things, pointing at them and shrieking for their immediate and constant ret...
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Life Without the Internet

We are surviving. Six months ago, I made the brave— yet possibly annihilating— decision to cut the internet at home. Immediately, upon disconnection, I expected my children to rally for my execution. However, contrary to expectations, my children began sputtering, gasping for breath, pushing forth into rebirth.      Was it possible to survive without being plugged in?      My family grumbled for a while. They challenged my firm stance, my claims that television and the internet corrupt, with the stock accusations so often directed at parents: "It's always what you want. We have to do what you want." This went on for a while, but then— like all arguments— the words soon lost their freshness, their power. The argument became stale and the family settled into the idea of life without the love/laugh/death/sex (of other people's imagined lives) mainlined directly into our mental veins.      Contrary to what I expected, the bored proclamation: "The...

Oedipus Disney

The wonderful world of Disney? Only if you relish the idea of mothers and fathers being slaughtered at the turn of every cinematic corner. The most celebrated and beloved films of all times! Delightful, enchanting and touching! The beauty of nature and the miracle of life! Let's take a polite peek at the individual cases, shall we:  The Hunchback of Notre Dame : Quasimodo's mother is hurled onto the ground by the evil Frollo, her head smashed against the cathedral steps. Dead as a door nail.      The Lion King : Simba's father, Mufasa, is dropped from a cliff by his sadistic brother, Uncle Scar, whereby he plummets to the ground and is violently crushed by a herd of stampeding antelope.  Bambi:  Need I say more? The most famous butchery of a mommy in film history.  Propagator  of patricide and matricide, good old Oedipus Disney's films are littered with a plethora of missing or dead parents:       Peter Pan  is parentless. Free...

Atlantic Film Festival Targets Atlantic Canadian Films For Near Eradication

Mind-Boggling Statistics and Humiliating Disrespect Brought to You by Halifax-based AIFF   In 2022, 84 films made by Atlantic Canadian filmmakers were screened at the Atlantic International Film Festival.   In 2023, 30 films made by Atlantic Canadian filmmakers were screened at the Atlantic International Film Festival.   By slashing 54 screening slots that were historically held by Atlantic Canadian filmmakers, and setting its sights on busting out of the shadow of TIFF, it appears as though the Atlantic International Film Festival (celebrating its 45th year) is experiencing a mid-life crisis and massive nervous breakdown (coupled with delusional behaviour and identity crisis) that require urgent counselling.  Demanding intervention, in the hopes of saving AIFF from its own dangerously misguided hand, Atlantic Canadian filmmakers and audiences are boycotting the festival until AIFF admits it is in crisis and promises to seek therapy.  Filmmakers and audiences ar...